


A Cup of Pain

by KittyFartingBubbles



Category: SEVENTEEN (Band)
Genre: Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Army Seungcheol, Barista Jihoon, Established Relationship, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Minor Character Death, betweenyouandme
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-06
Updated: 2016-12-06
Packaged: 2018-09-06 23:54:02
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,178
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8774695
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/KittyFartingBubbles/pseuds/KittyFartingBubbles
Summary: This is for between you & me - the Jicheol fanfic festivalPrompt: Exulansis; the tendency to give up trying to talk about an experience because people are unable to relate to it.Dor; a deep and nostalgic feeling of sadness, agony and emptiness experienced upon intensily missing, longong and earning for something or someone.I'm really sorry this is so late, still hope you guys enjoy this mess :)





	

 

Time to run. Jihoon dresses a pair of sweatpants and a t-shirt above a long sleeve, laces up his sneakers and heads out, grabbing his phone on his way out. The sun is now starting to rise, Jihoon loves the spraying colors the waking sun is reflecting, they are alluring, exquisite, it always brings a small involuntary smile to his lips.

 

His route is now routine, burned to the back of his head, it never changes. Six miles of mixed ground, sidewalk and the forest park that are always the same. Jihoon starts with an easy pace, gaining speed to the small slopes, tree roots and even rocks that will come ahead. By the three-mile mark, the day is not sunny anymore, instead, it's turning darker by the minute, announcing rain, but he is not one to give up, Jihoon will finish it when he does.

 

It starts a few minutes later, rain, a few drops here and there. Jihoon pauses to wipe his face on the edge of the sleeve, he still has a little less than half to finish. The ground is getting muddy and he slips, catching his foot on a root, but still managing to stay upright. With little no sun, the road is getting dim, the thick trees blocking the yellowish light of the sun rays.

 

It starts to fell incessantly in a blink of an eye, [thunder and lighting](https://rainymood.com/) in the sky, and that is when Jihoon thinks that maybe he should go back, he will run an extra mile or two tomorrow. He is damp to the bone, water running down his neck, chilling him to the tip of his toes, fat drops surrounding him everywhere, it reminds him of tears, and Jihoon does not want to think of that, he's long gone stop caring, Jihoon as given up.

 

-

  
_Jihoon notices him the moment he walks in. It's impossible not to; the guy is tall, gorgeous and smiles at him with the goofiest smile he as ever seen. The smile may be goofy, but he blinds Jihoon for a few seconds and when he looks up the customer is already coming towards the counter._

 

_Soonyoung is talking behind his back, in hushed tones with his mother. Jihoon even hears them laugh, and when he turns around to show his displeasure at them his mother gives him a kind smile._

 

_"Your first client is here honey. Please treat them well."_

 

_Soonyoung coughs, using a hand to hide his smile, but Jihoon can perfectly see that he is laughing because he thinks that Jihoon cannot be nice. He is wrong, Jihoon can be very nice, Jihoon is also sixteen and maybe a little in love, but who cares?_

 

_"I'm gonna date that," he declares solemnly, this time making Soonyoung choke, serves him right for not believing in Jihoon._

 

_"Way too out of your league." Soonyoung manages to say between laughs but still gives Jihoon a thumbs up, making himself scarce when the customer finally comes to the counter._

 

_"I'll have some tea," he says, eyes scanning the variety of drinks behind Jihoon. "Chamomile. No sugar."_

 

_"You go to a coffee shop to ask for tea?" Jihoon teases._

 

_"Yup!"_

 

_"Alright then."_

 

-

 

Jihoon opens Diamond at seven every morning. He checks the stock, pull up the blinds, run a rag on the counter and tables, unstack all the chairs, and finally, flip the sign on the door from 'Closed' to 'Open'. Every morning Soonyoung would come running late, mumbling some impossible to believe story for his tardiness, Jihoon would just shoo him away to the back for a change of clothes and thus, it started another new day at the coffee shop that _they_ owned.

 

Today was different, Soonyoung was sick, only managing to give one of his half-assed excused for not coming to work today. The sky was gray and gloomy, the soft pit-a-pat of the rain calming him down, helping him relaxing in such a stressful day, because Jihoon swore, if the next customer did not dignify himself to clean his shoes on the welcome mat, there was going to be violence, possibly even blood.

 

Jihoon was busy today, the bad weather bringing in people looking for a hot beverage or just a dry place where they could take a break from the rain outside. With Soonyoung gone for the day, he barely had the time to eat, eating a sandwich between orders and orders of hot chocolate, coffee, and tea. Tea, Jihoon hated tea, who would come to a coffee shop to drink tea?

 

-

 

_Choi Seungcheol darted across the street, bouncing a little, and slowly coming to a stop in front of a coffee shop. The chilly autumn wind blows around him and he pulled his woolen beanie further down his ears, peering over the window looking for Jihoon._

 

_Soonyoung sees him and waves at him, mentioning for him to get inside, Seungcheol does that, he walks towards the door, hand outstretched reaching for the knob. He pushes the door with such enthusiasm, that he manages to walk straight into the glass with a thud. He winces softly, lifting a hand to rub at his forehead, under the beanie and frowns._

 

_He looks up and sees Jihoon, an amused smirk on his lips, a laughing Soonyoung next to him on the counter. "What should I call you?"_

 

_"Jihoon?" Jihoon answers._

 

  
_"No, if someone asks about our relationship," Seungcheol says, "what should I call you?"_

 

  
_"I don't know. I’m bad at relationships." Jihoon signs to Soonyoung to flip the sign to closed, grabbing a cup to make some tea for Seungcheol._

 

_"Boyfriend? Lover?"_

 

_"No," Jihoon says bluntly._

 

_"Significant other?" Seungcheol accepts the cup with a grateful smile at Jihoon._

 

_"How about my significant annoyance?"_

  
-

 

Near the closing time, things start to get less crowded so he busied himself with mopping the floor, clean a few cups and the counter, and sipping some hot chocolate while watching the rain running down the windows. Or people avoiding the puddles, doing their best not to step on the cold freezing water, to keep their toes warm. If only Jihoon could be warm again.

 

His phone beeps from behind the counter, where Jihoon stashed him, warning him of a new message. He sighed, passing a cloth on the chairs that was left to clean and went to see who it was.

 

_Hope you will not be to mad at me :)_

 

Jihoon snorted at Soonyoung's message, and decided to ignore it, what better way to show his love if not when he chose not to yell at someone? The bell over the door chimed making Jihoon looking up surprised. Jihoon closed early, not long before the sun went down, and with such weather he was not expecting anyone else. The young man by the door was not carrying an umbrella, his coat was drenched and he's messy brown hair was plastered to his forehead. Jihoon frowned as the other stepped inside, the water dripping all over his clean floor.

 

"Hello, are you open?" The young man, mid-twenties, boyish face, broad shoulders, asked, hovering in the doorway.

 

"Barely," Jihoon said.

 

"Ah, good." He took this as an invitation and took out his coat, more water falling to the floor as he did. "It's pouring out there," he said unnecessarily, dropping a bag to the floor with a loud thud.

 

Jihoon folded his arms over his chest. "Can I get you something?"

 

"Tea?"

 

Jihoon huffed, glaring at the young man that was still dripping water on his clean counter.

 

"Was it a wrong order?" He asked, resting his elbows on the table

 

"Why come to a coffee shop if you want tea?" Jihoon asked, already working on the drink. The other watched him work, eyes never leaving Jihoon, making him feel uncomfortable with the amount of attention he was receiving. "There you go," Jihoon said, placing the cup down in front of him.

 

"So, what's new around here?" he asked.

 

"Is that a serious attempt to make conversation?" Jihoon asked.

 

"Hey, I've been gone a long time. This is my hometown, you know."

 

"I see."

 

"I'm closing soon," he reminded the other as he moved around and started stacking up the chairs.

 

-

 

_The oven rings warning Jihoon that the cake he was making is already baked. He knees, pulling the door open, the smell of fresh cake all around him, making him take a deep breath. He grabs the mitten and careful takes the cake out, marveling at how pretty it looks._

 

_"Nicely done, honey." His mother says proudly. "You have good hands, are you sure you want a musical career instead of the family business?"_

 

_The doorbell rings in that moment and Jihoon rushes to the door, ready to wish a happy birthday to Seungcheol, even if the cake is still not ready. He opens the door with a big smile on his face and jumps at Seungcheol. "Happy birthday!"_

 

_"Jihoon," he says gently getting out of his arms. "I know want I want to do for the rest of my life."_

 

_"Huh, I thought you wanted to be a rapper, write your own songs and lyrics, managing your own business?"_

 

_"That was my second plan, I want to join the army. I want to make something for my country, as silly as it may sound, I want to help others."_

 

_Jihoon nods slowly, the army talk had come around a few times, but never would he thought that Seungcheol was so adamant at pursuing it. He swallows his insecurities and worries and congratulates him with another hug and a gentle kiss. Jihoon was sure they were going to be okay, no matter what._

 

_"I love you Jihoon, forever."_

 

-

 

"Let me help."

 

"Don't need any help." He stacked up the chairs in no time, moving to the tables next, doing the same to them. "It's getting late," Jihoon said. "Don't you have somewhere to be?"

 

"Not really. I was wandering around and I saw this place, it looked warm and dry, cozy even."

 

"Well it was dry," Jihoon said, looking at the water on the floor.

 

"It's a nice cafe, I'm happy I discovered it. Even if it is run by a cranky young man."

 

Jihoon stopped at that, too tired to keep up the façade. He throws the cloth he was using to clean the coffee machine to the garbage and turns around, looking Seungcheol in the eye. "What do you want?"

 

"I missed you." Seungcheol takes a few steps, coming closer to Jihoon, he reaches a hand, trying to touch him, but Jihoon dodges.

 

"Stop, you do not have the right to say those words. I've been here all along. You were the one who went away."

 

-

 

_Soonyoung throws a popcorn at Jihoon's, he grabs it before it hits him and hurls it back to Soonyoung, catching him in the middle of the forehead._

 

_"Why so grumpy, Jihoon? You miss your boo?"_

 

_Jihoon takes a deep breath, before very slowly, giving the finger to Soonyoung. "Go home, don't you have your own house?"_

 

_"You're so cold, your mother feeds me, not to mention that she loves me more than she loves you."_

 

_"Your mother also loves me more than see loves you, so I guess we're even," Jihoon growls when his character dies in the stupid game they were playing, he ditches the control and crosses his arms on his chest._

 

_"No, but seriously, what's wrong?"_

 

_"Seungcheol is late. Seungcheol is never late. I just wanted to know how was his first week."_

 

_"Aw, you miss him already, you even turning to your old self, grumpy Jihoon is no fun!"_

 

_"Shut your ugly face or I will strangle to death."_

 

-

 

"It was my job Jihoon. Since I was a teen the only thing I talked about was joining the army. You were happy for me. You stick with me, give me the strength to move forward."

 

"You don't get it, you never will, Seungcheol."

 

"Jihoon, please, I come back like I promised." Seungcheol moves too fast this time, so Jihoon finds himself in a warm and familiar embrace. Jihoon does not hug back, he just lets his arms hung limply at his sides, counting the seconds that he's been trapped.

 

"She died, and you were not here, and I was stuck in this stupid place, taking care of a coffee shop that we both owned. I was engaged with someone who was not here when I needed the most, I begged you to come back, you said you couldn't."

 

Seungcheol hugged Jihoon tighter, not letting go of him. "I'm sorry, Ji. I come back as soon as I could. I really did."

 

"I was so lonely," Jihoon choked out, not believing the words that were leaving his mouth. No, he was not supposed to forgive Seungcheol so easily. He had to make him suffer, make him work to earn Jihoon's love.

 

"I'm here now, and I won't go anywhere, I promise, I will only work at the base. I will stay with you for as long as you want me." Seungcheol pressed his face into Jihoon's neck, leaving half a dozen light kisses there.

  
"You," Jihoon started, voice rough and heavy, he swallowed thickly, starting over again. "You're fucking impossible."

  
Seungcheol lifted his head for a moment, peeking at Jihoon with a small smile. It was wrong in his face, Seungcheol's face needed a big smile, a goofy one, where it showed his dimples, one that made him look happy.

  
"Pisses me off just to look at you," Jihoon continued.

  
"Then don't look."

 

Jihoon relaxed against Seungcheol, his breaths steady and regular, his body warm and comfy, his arms strong and safe Jihoon found himself pressing close rather than pulling away.

  
"Just stay here," Jihoon said, finally hugging back. "Just stay here forever."

  
-

 

_Soonyoung was the only one that was still with him, by now everyone went back to their lives, not worrying that his mother would no longer be home waiting for Jihoon. That was mostly the reason why he was still here, he could not imagine going back to an empty house, where there was no laughs or smiles, a sad house, now that the one who made it shine was gone._

 

_A hand comes to rest on his shoulder and for a moment, Jihoon thinks its Seungcheol, until he remembers how he begged for the other to come back and he said he couldn't._

 

_"I can't leave my unit like that, Jihoon, they need me."_

 

_Jihoon had laughed, like a mad man actually, because he needed Seungcheol and he was the one that should matter to his fiance, not people that he knows for a little over one year. They know each other since they were fifteen, that should count for everything, but it seems it didn't._

 

_He sniffles once more, cleaning his eyes and nose to the nice suit he was using, it was rented and it smelled weird. The hand on his shoulder grips tighter._

 

_"You're going to stay with me for a few weeks." Soonyoung lets him know. Soonyoung was his best friend and the one that arranged everything for his mother funeral. Soonyoung was the one here, not Seungcheol._

 

-

 

"I'm gonna shower," Seungcheol said, his voice fitted perfectly into the empty, sad space of Jihoon's house. _Their_ house. Seungcheol pilled his clothes in the bedroom, a mess of wet, smelly clothing right in the middle of their bedroom. _Charming_.

 

Some things never changed.

 

Ten minutes later, Seungcheol was out of the bathroom, "I'm going to shower too." He stripped off the rest of his clothes and folded them, putting them on the edge of the bed to wash it later.

 

Jihoon remembers when he called Seungcheol, crying and poured out an incoherent mess of phrases, saying the word dead a dozen times. He had been surprised, horrified, hurt, when Seungcheol said he needed time. That he could not leave like that, he had man depending on them. Jihoon forgives him a little every day, but he never forgot.

 

With a sigh, he turns off the water and grabs his towel to dry his body before changing to some sweat pants and a shirt. He half expected Seungcheol to be sleeping, but he wasn't. He was in the kitchen, the smell coming from his cooking was not bad. How long was Jihoon showering?

 

"Hungry?"

 

"Yeah."

 

They eat in silence, a few words traded, the heavy silence hanging around them like a hawk. Seungcheol never was a fan of silence, so it was no surprise when he started to ask. How was the cafe? What about Soonyoung? Do you still have those letters I wrote you? How are you?

 

"I'm tired."

 

Jihoon stood and Seungcheol handed him his plate as he took the dishes to the sink. He feels the sink with warm water and drops the plates inside. He hears Seungcheol's chair scrape as he pushed it back and a few moments later his arms wound around Jihoon's shoulders.

 

"Hey, let's go to bed."

 

Jihoon lets himself be manhandled, not fighting at all against Seungcheol's wishes, he wasn't kidding when he said he was tired. He is dead tired, to the bone, his head aches, his chest hurts, his throat is constricted. Maybe it's a cold, he muses for a few seconds, trying to fool himself.

 

"I needed to continue my mom business," Jihoon says has Seungcheol drops the covers over them and presses them together.

 

"You always said you wanted to be a singer," Seungcheol pressed.

 

Jihoon sighed. Seungcheol fell silent as he waited for him to answer.

 

"I feel that if I do this, she will be proud of me, she loves this place to death, she left this places to us."

 

"Jihoon." Seungcheol held him closer.

 

"It's true," Jihoon said flatly. "She teased me if I was sure of what I was going to do with my life, but I knew that she was a bit sad that I didn't want to own the place. I don't blame her, it was my decision, and even if I don't love what I do, I don't hate it. Not to mention that I think that things are going to get better."

 

"Hmm." He felt Seungcheol's lips against his cheek. "I'm sorry I made you wait for so long. I'm so sorry I wasn't here when you needed me the most, I will never forgive myself for hurting you the way I did."

 

"I haven't forgiven you yet." Jihoon feels Seungcheol tense against him, and Jihoon feels guilty for a few seconds. "Maybe if you wash the plates tomorrow."

 

"I can do that," Seungcheol breaths out a small laugh and Jihoon can feel the smile on his lips against his cheek. Jihoon turns his head and plants a chaste kiss on Seungcheol's lips, making him groan when he pushes away quickly.

 

"Okay, do that for the next six months and I will think about forgiveness."

 

-

_"Hey, Seungcheol?" Jihoon says, tapping him in the shoulder._

 

_"Yeah?"_

 

_"I love you too."_

 

_-_

The end

 

 


End file.
